Geographical Frustration.

Its exactly 2 mths since i’m back here.

Penang life has always been mild, pleasant and put it bluntly, senile. Is one good place to start a family. Reproduce sextuplets and later nag the six to reproduce the next generation. Its a good place to watch Taiwan soap operas and Korean dramas. Sigh. Is a place so gracious and tolerant that some really annoying ppl just dun “get it”. Is a place where ppl can bargain by the cents. 10 cents cheaper and what not. And likewise, the whole neigbourhood will be grumbling abt the coffee down the road which increased 10 cents. Is a place where ppl have time to line up for petrol for 1 hour just to save less than RM5.

god…

If we go abt thinking of our syillings all the time (which is cultural) i really think we cannot do great things. In the end, is all abt keeping the daily routines together. When to eat, when to shit. What to eat. What causes cancer and what not. (btw, almost everything causes cancer. Even rice causes cancer)

sigh. Then, what is life?

U go to church and u get the camp forms printed at the wrong side of the page. The photocopy pictures of the ppl look so black till it shines. And grieve, out of the handful of youths from a church of 150 strong, the sr pastor doesn’t even know you went out station to study (and came back after 3 years). I mean, i’ve already mentioned for the 100th time, everytime i come back, i wasn’t missing church. I was never studying in USM. I was in UM, KL!! SIgh. Everything is just so SENILE!!

Now that i’m going to NY, i’ve got a creative bunch of leaders (YES, LEADERS) telling the CG that i’m going for postgraduate studies and some even said to teach English. Wtf!! How does an Asian teach English in a Native Speaking nation like the US?!! I’ve already clearly, publicly mentioned its purpose on stage. This is NOT to teach English!

Just some thoughts, imagine how fast rumours and make up stories can be spread in a senile community? And worst still, no one bothers to correct or find out the truth.

Felt that the culture here is so much of “dun rock the boat” that we dun dare speak out when someone says something incorrect, we dun dare voice out when someone annoys, and most of all, we dun dare ask questions because its too impolite. So, we (in church), i dunno the rest of Pg island, remain a bunch of passive community. Laughing at grammar errors and spoonerisms. Honestly, after sometime, i really dun think is very funny. Is lame. Just canned laughter.

No wonder Edward seemed so frustrated (back then).

Can’t blamed him. Now, i begin to see what he was frustrated abt. Going to church doesn’t save you. Going to church doesn’t proof that you’re a good Christian. SIgh.

 

Media diversion

Anwar Ibrahim out from Turkish embassy

Sodomy for the 2nd time? I don’t believe he did it. C’mon.. would he sodomise someone at such a time like this? I’m sure is not fun been thrown into prison for so long. When we saw this we all thought this was a real big time prank played on Anwar.

Like it or not, some guys from BN might be in this.

Cuz’ couple days back, Raja Petra just filed a statutory declaration abt Najib’s wife.

Somebody’s trying to buy time… i wonder who’s the desperate one…? Najib? Abdullah? or the Dr. Jekyll we dun know.

Malaysia is indeed living thru intresting times. If you remember what you’ve learnt in school: “Malaysia sebuah negara yg aman damai dengan berbilang bangsa dan kaum” (Malaysia is a peaceful country with different races and backgrounds)… or “… dgn keadaan politiknya yang stabil, Malaysia satu negara yang dapat menarik aktiviti perniagaan dan pelancongan” (with its political stability, Malaysia is the country which attracts trade and tourism)

I dun think is gonna be so true anymore.

The government has lost the ppl’s trust.

That morbid stage.

Couple of days back, one of my neighbours who happened to be granma’s best friend past away. She was one of those angelic old ppl with a benelovent smile. For my granma, i thought it was pretty depressing being at that age.

You live to watch all yr friends die.

I just thought to myself, what’s there to look fwd… except death? I know this sounds morbid. Imagine being in an aging body, with a routine that includes falling asleep every few seconds in front of the tv… And all the kids in the family grow up and leave home… and plan to remain single (thus not reproduce). Its so depressing. What is there to look fwd to?

Putting myself in her shoes, i wonder what would i do?

She has always been the life wire of every social occasion and since i was a child, i’ve watched her song lead in church, tell stories that captivates ppl around, makes good jokes, makes them roar with laughter and makes everything spark up. It has always been like that. But now…?

Some of us will reach there someday.

Its a sad stage.